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I snapped awake when my head fell forward; I was sleeping while standing. It was the third time this morning.
Exhaustion had long ago set in, so it took several minutes before I realized I wasn't dreaming and that I recognized the voice. I was surprised when the pirate entered the kitchen through the side door. I hadn't seen her in months.
She had crossed to the receiving window without greeting me and poked her head through, looked both ways, then came back.
"Why do you say that?"
"Because you're here, and I haven't seen you in months."
She narrowed her eyes at me, then leaned back through the window.
"You were sleeping," she said over her shoulder. "You really should pay attention."
I followed the tilt of her jaw in time to see a person walk by outside. People had been walking by all morning; the kids were leaving and the place was crawling with parents.
But none of the other parents were wearing bullet-proof vests.
Starlight"I wasn't raised like this."
I already knew. Had he told me before? It was likely his brother, who was a liar, but that was irrelevant now.
"Only babies cry."
I knew that, too. I knew he was a baby; they were all sweet babies, the lot of them. They thought they were grown and acted in their versions of grown-up ways but they were babies.
"Thank God for Arkansas."
That's where his redemption started: a crowded cell in middle Arkansas. That's where he came from. We caught him in the middle of the DTs from God-knows-what he was hooked on.
"The whole summer I felt like I didn't belong. I wasn't here for the beginning. But now I understand that I sure as hell was supposed to be here for the end."
A tear, hidden on his cheek by hair and darkness, fell from the place where it'd clung to his jaw. It glinted briefly in the candlelight like a fallen star, and was gone.
Conjunction JunctionThe dog has to go.
Thursday I crawled into bed and didn't crawl out until Monday, when I had to or else. The baby was with her grandma, who was nearly as sick as I was, but who also had the distinctive benefits of a helpful work-from-home husband and the long-term visit of her little brother, who's fresh from prison.
Monday was doctor day.
I got out of bed when I couldn't sleep anymore, even though I was not awake in the least. My head ached in the vice-grip kinda way and it took a good two minutes of steaming to ungunk my eyes enough to see. That's not typical. Since I was up I wandered through the house, trying to coax a breath through my nose.
"It's story time! Let's sing and play games!"
I knew the sound of it from three rooms over and reluctantly rose from the warmth of the sofa to investigate.
It giggled. "Got my nose!" and it giggled again.
The dog has always had something of a mind of its own, but this was more peculiar than usual.
"It's learning time! Ruff ruff! I lov
Boxes unboxed boxes11:06 a.m.
It's been nearly a month, and nothing is the same.
The plants aren't where the plants go. The birds aren't where the birds go.
And there aren't nearly enough shelves or closets.
I'd swear to my story I'd poked my head in every box and bag in this place, but important things are still missing.
Toothbrush charger, for instance. My great-grandma's table cloth... laundry baskets and dvds and drink pitchers.
And you. You weren't in any of the boxes or bags, and I'm beside myself.
Did you stay at the old house to guard the things we left? That's what I hope, because it's the least worrisome. If you were here you'd know I quit the meds. Maybe it was a stupid thing to do... so far so good, I say. Yeah, I blow up and sometimes I cry. But as long as I don't crawl into bed, we're doing alright.
dead dog julyI.
the summer heat lays limp in the city’s lap,
breathing long oppressive breaths.
it does not even lift its lolling head
to bark out hoarse indignancy
when a strange man brings the mail.
there might be heavy rain today,
brought by some swollen, murmuring cloud.
the world will whirl and howl,
then settle down,
to die a little more.
o, quickly, love,
press your back against the wall in fear
as the universe spreads her arms and
shuts her eyes
and starts to summon the end of all things.
come with me
to the place of windows full of speechless afternoon
hot windy whispers of half-formed solutions and resolutions,
sweltering sunlit meadows we’ll wander and then forget.
o quickly, love,
let’s to the season of forgetting
and unwind all of our harshest memories
and fill the universe’s mouth
with mute cotton.
i’ll whisper these words to you some evening
with all my exigency in the hand i rest on your arm—
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Endorell-Taelos is very well known within the community for her selfless giving and gracious community spirit. Since joining DeviantART over seven years ago, Alicia has continued to make a positive impact on many deviants. Her helpful and thoughtful approach was one of her finest attributes when serving as a Community Volunteer, and this has continued throughout the many contests which Alicia provides on a regular basis. As we approach our Birthday celebrations, we can't... Read More